The Man We Married

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They say good girls go bad ‘cause bad guys don’t treat them right

A good woman is as scarce as a dog’s tears

And I remember Marriage was never meant to be a fight but a period to garnish our lives

I hate that I once loved but now I detest

But please don’t judge me for the things I did and did not do

No diary ever told a perfect story

 

I can’t remember a pinch of how it felt like to be happy

To know that in the millions that cared, there’s one who’d even breathe for you

I can’t remember why I made any decisions I made, whether for fear, love or ignorance

Or why I sacrificed my life for slavery before an altar of compassion

 

For every second I knew I was right, even before the sceptics and critics

Nothing could shake the foundation of certainty I had built, whether in faith or doubt

Or so I thought

Not even the stakes and trials that loomed in my mind stood as an obstacle to my grounded decisions

Whatever they were on.

 

This one’s for those ladies who felt they’ll lay down their lives for a man they loved and married

 

Living the dream and believing fairy tales were the realities of the future

Sacrificing your breath, health, passions and plans

For birth, assistance and greatness you hoped to achieve in the warmth of a man who promised to kill even the King for you

Being the holiest of you, because at least that’s what the Good Book taught you to

Yet the crew of in-laws with your own Man in lead, rips out your heart and patience in contempt and asks you to remain a loyal lady

 

This one’s for you

Who trusted your hunches, ignored dirty talk and fought for the man you believed was a saint

Who gave it all up to be fat and wasted pushing up your Man’s dreams like a stick to a bent tree

Struggling to raise kids who might never even grow to finally take care of you

This one’s for you

who gave up all this and more

to receive drunk late nights, be beaten up daily like filth, cheated on with outside brats,

neglected and reminded of how much you’ve meant less

And then tossed to the streets like trash

This one’s for you

who felt you must put him first in everything, believing he’ll do same

Yet pouring out all this energy to live the ‘We’ dream and yet get the response “woman, you can’t change my life”

Yes, this one’s for you

when you decide all this must stop and you turn on a new page,

walk away from those sacrifices cos they mean nothing now;

remind yourself of how much you can stand alone cos you deserve to be self-made

when others feel you have been worse than a maid even to yourself

This one’s for you

when the crowd judges and despises your scars, decisions and fury

when they have not the slightest idea what you’ve been through

This one’s for

My beautiful ladies to rise again after a broken marriage.

****

[Courtesy of the author]

Link to the Italian translation

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